Don Of The Dead Series Episode 2 – Romance is Dead

Don of The Dead - my ongoing comedy series about an inept zombie.
Don of The Dead – my ongoing comedy series about an inept zombie.

Don of The Dead – Series Overview

Don is recently deceased but didn’t quite make it to the other side, so seems doomed to join the rotting ranks of the undead rubbing shoulders with the living who have now begrudgingly accepted that some people just refuse to die.

Each short episode finds Don dealing with the everyday difficulties of being a walking corpse.

Previous Episodes can be found here or by selecting the Don of The Dead category.


Don of The Dead #2 – Romance is Dead

I was beginning to regret my decision to go dating again. Perhaps the girl at the agency had been right. In her experience, most members of the living were a little squeamish around the dead, but I was insistent – a warm-blooded female, or nothing.

Trying to ignore the sideways glances of diners at Joie de Vivre, I took a gulp of water from the glass on the table. By the time I’d realised my mistake, cool liquid was leaking from the hole in my neck to form another stain amongst the many that already dappled my borrowed pale-blue tuxedo.

Finally she arrived – long red hair, flowing black dress and a bejeweled eye-patch covering her left eye, it’s shiny gems still no match for the right eye, which was emerald-green and twinkling with mischief.

I quickly stood to greet her, tearing my shirt on the corner of the table to reveal my ragged ribcage. I felt nausea as my sloppy heart and lungs slapped against the partially exposed bones, spattering blood across the clean white table cloth and my suit. There was a gasp from nearby diners. A waiter recoiled. My date gave me a warm smile.

“Hello, I’m Janine,” she said, calmly handing me a napkin. “You must be Don?”

I nodded, dumbly.

“Well, I can already see you like to wear your heart on your sleeve!”

We both laughed and I think I fell in love.

Who says romance is dead?


I try to post one of these on a weekly basis – along with other flash fiction and blog posts. As ever, I would love your feedback, comments, tweets and blog follows so please click to your heart’s content.

Author: Wayne

2 thoughts on “Don Of The Dead Series Episode 2 – Romance is Dead

  1. This is fun! I like fun fiction in flash sized chunks, so will be following the adventures of Zombie Don…

    Regards the writing, I have a minor nit pick, this line,

    A waiter recoiled, but my date just gave me a warm smile.

    I think I’d change it to,

    The waiter recoiled, my date gave me a warm smile.

    Gets rid of the ‘just’ word, and strengthens the meaning behind the smile.

    Feel free to disregard though… 😉

    1. Thanks Maria – have you been reading my comments on Victoria Grefer’s blog today?! I actually said that one of my writing tics is using ‘just’ and ‘simply’ too much! You’re right. I’ve removed it.

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